Clown
by MsLane
Summary: After having her classmates laugh at her, Brittany can't help but feel the need to let it out through song. Based on Emeli Sande's song 'Clown' Brittana


**_A/N: Literally heard this song, and I couldn't get the idea out of my head. It gave me a lot of Brittany feelings. I am not saying I did this justice at all, because it played out in my head and then it just...i dont know what happened, but I know it isn't exactly like I saw it in my head lol If anyone wants a shot at this, then by all means go for it...if it's already been done, i apologize._**

* * *

"San?"

The brunette hums as she turns around to look at Brittany, "Yes babe?"

"I want to sing this song, but my voice isn't really very good and I was wondering if you could maybe…sing it for me and I'd dance to it?"

Santana smiles lovingly at her girlfriend and nods her head, "Yeah sure thing. What is it?"

Brittany gives her a rather muted smile, and that should have been Santana's first clue as to what kind of song it is, "Clown."

Furrowing her brow, Santana tries to recall the song, but Brittany simply smiles at her gently and plays the song.

_I guess it's funnier from where you're standing  
'Cause from over here I missed the joke  
Clear the way for my crash landing  
I've done it again  
Another number for your notes_

Recognition dawns on Santana, and then her eyes widen before frowning, "Baby…why do you want to sing this?"

Brittany shrugs, "Well, because that's what I am. I'm a clown. Yes, I'm a unicorn but now I'm a colorful one."

Santana shuffles over to the bed, where Brittany's lying down with the laptop across her midsection and moves it, and wraps her arms around her girlfriend, "Why do you want to sing this?" Santana asks again, just as gently, nuzzling her face into Brittany's neck.

"Because…that's what almost everyone thinks of me as San. I can't do anything right. You saw them in class today…I just…" Blue eyes tear up and she ducks her head to try and stop from sniffling but she's caught and Santana pulls her flush against her, wrapping her arms tightly around her and holding her as she cries.

Santana whispers loving things into her ear as she holds her, trying to keep herself calm so that she doesn't start crying at her girlfriend's distress and hurt, her heart having nothing to do with that because it's weeping in her chest.

"Baby…that's not…you aren't a clown baby…Britt sweetheart, you aren't."

Brittany nods her head, bottom lip trembling, "Yes. I am San."

"I'll help you B. I will, and you're going to prove them all wrong, you'll see."

It takes a while for them both to calm down again, for them to simply be laying in each other's arms, rather than it being a necessity, it's out of comfort.

It's then that Brittany speaks up quietly, "Can you still sing it with me, please?"

Santana nods her head as she tightens her hold on Brittany's waist, "Anything you want."

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Santana gets up and walks to the front of the choir room and folds her arms across her chest, "Aight listen up."

After getting everyone's attention, she takes in a deep breath and shrugs her shoulders, "You guys have to listen real careful at what I'm saying. They aren't my words…they mean something to Britt and I want for you guys to hear it. I _will_ kick anyone's ass if you decide to be a…" she pauses and rolls her eyes, "just listen up and feel me ya?"

Quinn mutters "wanky," under her breath, and the minute she and Rachel notice Santana hasn't cracked a smile, they know it's rather serious.

Brittany stands up and wraps her arms around Santana for a quick hug before walking off and leaving her in the spotlight.

_I guess it's funnier from where you're standing  
'Cause from over here I missed the joke  
Clear the way for my crash landing  
I've done it again  
Another number for your notes_

Santana shuts her eyes as she feels herself start to want to cry, however, as she moves to sing the next verse, Brittany takes over and she nods to herself because this is meant to be her song anyways.

She takes a seat right in the front, making sure she keeps eye contact with her as she dances gently, heartbreakingly across the room.

_I'd be smiling if I wasn't so desperate  
I'd be patient if I had the time  
I could stop and answer all of your questions  
As soon as I find out  
How I can move from the back of the line_  
_  
I'll be your clown  
Behind the glass  
Go 'head and laugh  
'Cause it's funny  
I would too if I saw me  
I'll be your clown  
On your favorite channel  
My life's a circus, circus  
Round in circles  
I'm selling out tonight  
_  
_I'd be less angry if it was my decision  
And the money was just rolling in  
If I had more than my ambition  
I'll have time for please  
I'll have time for thank you  
As soon as I win  
_

Quinn gently, wordlessly, places her hand in Santana's and holds on to it, knowing just how difficult it is for the brunette to see her girlfriend so effected, yet not knowing how to fix it immediately.

Brittany shrugs her shoulders as she finally decides to stand still and sing the song.

_I'll be your clown  
Behind the glass  
Go 'head and laugh  
'Cause it's funny  
I would too if I saw me  
I'll be your clown  
On your favorite channel  
My life's a circus, circus  
Round in circles  
I'm selling out tonight_

From a distance my choice is simple  
From a distance I can entertain  
So you can see me  
I put makeup on my face  
But there's no way you can feel it  
From so far away

I'll be your clown  
Behind the glass  
Go 'head and laugh  
'Cause it's funny  
I would too if I saw me  
I'll be your clown  
On your favorite channel  
My life's a circus, circus  
Round in circles  
I'm selling out tonight

Rachel is the first to dart out of her seat and wrap her arms tightly around Brittany and bury her face into her body as she says so only Brittany can hear, "I don't think you're a clown Brittany. I don't think it and neither does Santana, or Quinn…No one here in glee thinks so. I…We. We'll. Britt you're not a clown."

Santana snorts as she places a hand on Brittany's shoulder having heard Rachel's loss for words but says nothing as Quinn joins them and places her hand on Brittany's other shoulder, "We'll make it so no one laughs at you anymore B. No one."

Quinn and Santana's eyes lock around Brittany and Santana looks so grateful and thankful and Quinn shakes her head subtly before wrapping her arms around Rachel and Brittany's still hugging form and joins them in the hug.

Pretty soon the rest of the club joins in and there commences one of their well known group hugs.

Santana once again meets Quinn's eyes and she cannot begin to explain just how thankful she is…she wouldn't be able to get through without these people.

She's going to make sure Brittany never feels like she's a clown again. She's going to make sure no one ever laughs at her again.

Brittany…Brittany is going to make that happen, and she's just going to support her and help her get there.


End file.
